Today has been upsetting to be honest, on Sunday it will be the anniversary of my Dad’s death, and, although it’s been fourteen years it’s still a painful and stressful time. I can’t explain it but the run up to the day is almost worse than the day itself. All the feelings come flooding back and I have to let it out or I just become an angry mess. I’ve written about it before and it’s made me feel more balanced and helped me to relax, but ultimately, it still hurts. Usually I keep myself busy with work or plans outside the house, now that’s not an option, it’s a struggle. You can read about my experience with grief here; https://beckyelvinamennell.com/2019/02/27/mental-health-speak-out-grief-in-the-thirteenth-year/
The loss of a parent is truly an absolute nightmare at any age, there’s no way of explaining it because the emotions are so vast it’s insane. I know this might sound a bit like I’m preaching here, but I honestly can’t define it. It’s many things. It’s just awful. It probably happens to 95% of people at some point in their life, but no matter the circumstances, it’s always painful.
Anyway, let’s move on, aside from my earlier meltdown, I made a lovely chicken curry for dinner, we went shopping and I had a good laugh with John McCabe and the Pub Quiz. It’s been a funny day, but tomorrow will be better. I’m planning some crafting and sunshine, so fingers crossed for that.
Also, my ring came out of my Imperial Candle and that’s a good way to end the day in my mind.
Here’s hoping for a better day all round tomorrow!